The Smartest Person in the Room: When Exceptional Intelligence Becomes a Career-Ending Liability
- Caryn Cridland
- Feb 12
- 14 min read
Updated: 6 days ago
I almost didn't post this article. Too controversial. Too likely to offend brilliant executives. If you feel uncomfortable reading it, it's probably the article you most need right now.
I am not here to make you wrong for your brilliance. I am here to say there is a way out of your current situation. It requires some deep inner work, and the results are astounding.
Before we jump into the article the image above is the closest I could find to Teddy Swims. I am going Teddy crazy at the moment. Listen to the first verse of this song. It expresses the extreme struggles with the loss of control required for some executives.
Play this in the background as you read the article.
The Crisis Unfolding in Your C-Suite Right Now
Picture this: An executive with exceptional technical mastery, strategic brilliance, and undeniable results is facing their final written warning. HR complaints have accumulated.
Team members are resigning. Cross-functional stakeholders refuse to attend meetings.
The C-suite ask me, "What do we do? Their performance metrics are exceptional, but their leadership style polarises people. Their team is refusing to work with him/her."
Here's what is happening: Your most brilliant executive just became your biggest liability. And you probably promoted them there yourself.
In my twenty years transforming elite executives through career-defining crises, I've witnessed this scenario countless times.
The paradox is stark: the exceptional intelligence that propelled these brilliant leaders into senior roles can become the weapon that destroys their careers.
I call them "brilliant exceeders." They excel on every measure - performance, strategy, results, outcomes, and yet some of them are dismantling your teams right now.
The Paradox Nobody Wants to Acknowledge
Organizations repeatedly promote their highest technical performers into leadership roles, then express dismay when these brilliant contributors become liability-creating managers, and executives.
This isn't bad luck. It's predictable. And in part, understandable, how do you reward genius? This organizational challenge spans many different industries and roles.
Research that tracked over 53,000 salespeople across six years concluded that the best salespeople consistently became the worst sales managers (Benson, Li, & Shue, 2019).
This validated "The Peter Principle"—employees are promoted based on success in their current role until they reach a position where they lack the competencies to succeed (Peter & Hull, 1969). As Dr. Laurence Peter stated: "In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to their level of incompetence."
What happens when that level of incompetence is in “soft” leadership skills that are really hard for this brilliant exceeder to execute at Executive levels?
Research tells us that:
Half of all employees have left a job specifically to "get away from their manager" (Gallup, 2019).
Deficits in emotional intelligence, particularly poor interpersonal skills and difficulty managing change are primary contributors to executive derailment (Ruderman, Hannum, Leslie, & Steed, 2001).
Toxic leaders who are highly competent technically systematically create unhealthy environments, with consequences reaching far beyond individual team members (Kusy & Holloway, 2009).
These leadership behaviors lead to significantly lower work engagement and higher job performance issues (Lee, Sim, & Tuckey, 2024).
The Promotion Trap:
Brilliant exceeder excels at individual contribution
Gets promoted as reward for results
New role requires people leadership, a completely different skill set
Lacks interpersonal competencies needed to excel at leadership
Polarises - their strategic and analytical abilities are revered by the C-suite
Junior staff name them as their most hated leadership style
Team complaints accumulate, turnover accelerates
Translation? Your smartest person is costing you your best people.
The organization has a dilemma.
How can you sack a revered genius?
How can you keep a sledgehammer?
The "Brilliant Exceeder" Crisis: Why Everyone Loses
This isn't just one person's problem. It's an organizational poly-crisis, destroying value at three levels.
For the Executive: Identity Annihilation
After decades of being "the smartest person in the room," their entire sense of worth is tied to intellectual achievement, and results. A devastating 360 review, HR warning, a bullying and harassment investigaton, or job loss doesn't just threaten their career, it threatens their whole identity.
One executive told me: "I've spent 40 years being the best at everything. If I'm not brilliant, I'm nothing."
Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck's research (2006) shows that individuals with "fixed mindsets" about intelligence experience criticism as existential threat, rather than developmental opportunity. They literally cannot hear feedback. Their nervous system interprets it as danger. It feels personal, as if their parents are withdrawing their love for them.
The "Most Hated" Leadership Style
Being led by a brilliant exceeder can be inspiring at times. Some are in awe of their genius aptitude for finding novel solutions to complex problems, their ability to think 100 steps ahead while most are still grasping the problem, and their ability to exceed on outcomes no matter what. But for some people it is hard to turn up to work each day knowing you will be interrogated, dominated, controlled, micromanaged, shut down, demoralised, and belittled.
One team member described it to me this way:
"I stopped contributing in meetings. What was the point? He'd already decided, and if you disagreed, you'd be made to feel stupid. It was death by a thousand intellectual cuts."
The impact is devastating for more junior staff working for brilliant exceeders:
Learned helplessness: Initiative dies when every decision requires approval
Chronic anxiety: Fear of mistakes creates paralysis
Imposter syndrome: Constant intellectual superiority erodes confidence
Talent exodus: Your most capable people leave, others stay disengaged
For the Organization: The Psychological Safety Collapse
In 2016 Google's Project Aristotle identified psychological safety as the #1 predictor of high-performing teams. And yet, brilliant exceeders are obliterating it, still 10 years on.
The cost? Lost institutional knowledge. Recruitment expenses. Reputational damage. And teams performing well below their innovation potential.
Real Life Case Study: "David"—When Brilliance Becomes A Weapon
A COO contacted me about their direct report. "David" was technically brilliant, encyclopedic knowledge, exceptional work quality, absolute dedication. He was also systematically destroying his team.
Formal and informal complaints had accumulated over years. Team members resigned. Cross-functional partners refused meeting invitations so his manager had to attend meetings for him. Junior staff made zero decisions without his approval, paralyzed by fear of his reaction.
The COO's observation cut to the bone: "He's fixated on being the smartest person in the room. Even if he is, he's only as good as his team. If you disenfranchise the team, you won't get the outcomes you want."
David's Pattern
Daily team meetings that prevented autonomy and signaled distrust (which he rationalized as "ensuring quality outcomes").
Interrogation-style questions designed to demonstrate superior knowledge rather than genuine curiosity. Team members described feeling "interrogated rather than coached."
Emotional dysregulation when his expertise was questioned. Managers described his anger and low tone of voice as "chilling a room," with some junior team members shaking after interactions.
Total resistance to feedback, "collaborative coaching," and team building activities for three years didn't work. He was "visibly checked out," "shutters hard down," displaying "no contrition, no thought about the impact he was having on others."
Nothing changed.
Then came the final written warning. David's job was on the line. His boss and the organisation had had enough. They called me.
What a Crisis Creates That Coaching Cannot
"Suddenly," after the written warning David became "extremely careful" in meetings, and kept quiet, not wanting to continue to have a negative impact on others.
His nervous system finally registered: This is real. I could lose everything.
When I met David I heard a very different story. He was a highly intelligent, capable man, a top performer whose accumulated unprocessed grief as a result of a number of deaths of loved ones had finally overwhelmed his nervous system's capacity to regulate. He was living entirely in his head, analyzing, catastrophizing, and ruminating. He was teary, grey, and shaking the first time we met.
David used achievement and busyness as sophisticated forms of grief avoidance. The workplace crisis was real, but it was downstream from the deeper crisis: years of prioritizing function over feeling, achievement over healing, performance over presence.
He needed permission to feel, tools to regulate, and a reframe that this breakdown was actually his breakthrough trying to happen.
The breakthrough? David discovered his intellectual brilliance didn't have to be his entire identity. He did deep inner work, recognised his patterns, calmed his nervous system, and from there he was able to resolve the crisis, and became the great leader he wanted to be.
It took a crisis, and psychologically-focused, root cause, pattern-interrupting coaching with skill building to get there.
Gentle, symptom-focused coaching could never reach the places needed to awaken this brilliant exceeder.
Real Life Case Study: "Sarah"—From Redundancy to Conscious Leadership
"Sarah" was a senior executive leading major transformation work. She was a classic brilliant exceeder. She'd built her entire identity around intellectual achievement.
During our work together, she traced the pattern to its source. Her parents' love was conditional upon academic excellence.
In primary school a 90% test score was met with "Why not 100%?" Achievement became the currency of connection. Being smart became armor, her unconscious way of ensuring love and safety.
Her upbringing had left Sarah feeling”not good enough” deep down, and so she compensated for it her whole career.
This childhood survival pattern manifested in her leadership as:
Dominating team discussions to provide "the perfect solution"
Needing to win every argument to prove intellectual superiority
Completely missing the human beings in front of her
Polarising the people she worked with, boards loved her, junior staff hated her
As Sarah reflected: "I was so focused on winning the argument, and showing how smart I was that I completely missed the people in the room."
Then came redundancy from a dream role in a dream organisation. It was devastating, identity-shattering, and ultimately hugely transformative. (She is now loving her new role in her new organization even more!)
The Transformation
Sarah's reflection still gives me chills:
"I was on autopilot. My default was quite negative. It took losing my job to realize I was responsible for those relationship breakdowns."
Her transformation was profound. She moved from "head to heart," learning to:
Sit in silence during meetings
Allow her team to solve problems themselves
Contribute only "the missing link" when invited
Sarah's new leadership principle: "My value isn't proving I'm smartest. It's bringing out the whole team's talents."
She now says I’m "feeling more now, and it feels real, not calculated."
Translation: She finally became the leader her teams needed. They finally felt supported, valued, and appreciated. Her transformation led to teams expressing their sincere gratitude for having the opportunity to work with her. One even hugged her. She was brilliant after all, and now an exceptional leader too! And the icing on the cake was that her marriage and family life completely changed too. She was more present, joyous, and grateful for her life, and family.
The Root Cause Nobody's Addressing
These patterns aren't professional skills gaps. They're psychological patterns rooted in childhood experiences.
Neuroscience research shows that childhood attachment experiences literally wire our brains for how we relate to authority, handle criticism, and derive self-worth.
For children who learned that "being smart equals being worthy," intelligence becomes a survival strategy.
The pattern compounds over decades:
Childhood: Intelligence earns parental approval (sometimes the only way to get it)
School: Academic achievement creates social status
University: Intellectual performance determines opportunities
Early career: Technical excellence drives promotion
Mid-career: Suddenly, the same behaviors that created fast success destroys working relationships
By the time they reach executive leadership, their identity is so fused with intellectual achievement that any threat to their "smartest person" status feels like death.
Because, to their nervous system, it is.
What C-Suite Leaders Can Do Today
If you're a C-Suite managing a brilliant executive with collateral damage, here's what my two decades of practice reveals actually works:
1. Create Clear Boundaries with Unambiguous Consequences
Stop the gentle symptom-focused coaching. It doesn't work. They know they need to develop better relationships but their brain is focused on getting results at all costs (as this is how they unconsciously believe they will be worthy).
These individuals need clarity: "Your technical work is exceptional. We have received a number of complaints about you dominating meetings, and not allowing others to speak. This needs to change. We are going to provide you with some support."
Clarity is care.
In my experience, brilliant exceeders' don’t always get clear, consistent, and direct feedback from their managers. As a result, they often don't really know the full extent of the problem until the final warning, investigation, or complaint. The behavior needs to be identified, monitored, and addressed early on, long before the formalities.
2. Provide More Directive Leadership
This feels counterintuitive, but brilliant exceeders often respond well to clear direction.
When identity rests on control and achievement, knowing exactly what's expected is paradoxically freeing.
Don't assume that they even know how to turn their working relationships around. They wouldn't be in the situation they are in if they did! And this is the core problem with the “empower your leaders” style coaching from C Suites. This approach requires the leader to know how to do what’s required, and often they don’t know where to start.
Standard leadership coaching also doesn’t work alone, because telling a manager their staff say they’re being micro-managed doesn't stop the unconscious urge to micro-manage to get the results that create the dopamine hit. This link in their brain requires rewiring.
Often they need a step-by-step guide on how to turn their relationships around, one conversation, or relationship at a time.
Don't bother asking: "How do you think you could improve your relationships with your team?"
Instead say: "Here are the three specific behavioral changes I need to see in the next 90 days:
In meetings ask open ended (what and how) questions before you share your opinion, or offer solutions. (Seek first to understand then be understood - Stephen Covey).
Check in with others - have "meta-conversations" about conversations and meetings. Ask your direct reports individually for feedback on how they felt the meeting went.
In 1:1 meetings, ask "how do you feel about the changes/the project/your role in X?" and listen to their response, paying attention to their feelings and needs and label these where possible to show you’re listening, and care."
3. Invest in Specialized Psychological Coaching
Standard leadership development will not identify childhood-deep patterns that are setting brilliant exceeders up for leadership failures.
Instead they need:
Psychologically-informed coaching addressing core identity and attachment patterns, and in some cases deeper trauma-informed psychological interventions
Emotional intelligence development, particularly recognising emotions, emotional regulation, and behavioral empathy
Identity work building sense of self worth beyond intellectual achievement and results
I know this comment is going to spark controversy, but in my experience brilliant exceeders are often wonderful people trapped inside a cage of their own out-dated beliefs that they are only worthy if they are smart, the best, and achieving greatly. They see results, performance, and outcomes as badges of honour indicating their value. Inside is a young child who never felt loved for just existing.
It is no wonder they are micromanaging, interrogating, and dominating. Their unconscious mind believes their survival depends on it. These deep seated beliefs about themselves can only be solved through humility, and a willingness to develop deep self-awareness. And for those brilliant exceeders who dare, the results are fast, and incredible.
Fast because they know how to commit, self-motivate, implement, and achieve results quickly. We leverage these skills to build great leadership skills fast.
Brilliant exceeders are by far my best and favourite clients, as they implement the day of the session. Not today, not next week, and not never (as other some clients choose to do!).
Incredible because not only does their working life completely change, and they end up promoted, and getting countless positive feedback from their collegues, and managers, their relationships with their partners, children, family and friends become deeper and more satisfying. Their volunteering on boards, their church or temple, their roles in associations, and charities are also enhanced. Their whole world changes once they come home to themselves.
4. Validate Progress Consistently
Brilliant exceeders are often desperate for validation, even though they appear supremely confident. They are particularly attuned to whether, or not they are getting the validation they need from their managers. Their manager, is in fact, an unconscious representation of their parent/s, and so they seek validation, and are devastated when they don’t get it in the way they need it.
Implementation: Weekly check-ins positively acknowledging specific interpersonal, or leadership improvements are vital to success, particularly in the early days of their behavioral change:
"I noticed you asked follow-up questions in today's meeting rather than providing immediate solutions. The team responded really well to this. How did it feel?"
5. Protect Your Other Staff
It can be really challenging supporting brilliant exceeders, and other staff at the same time.
While supporting their transformation, you cannot sacrifice your broader team/s.
Implementation
Early on you may need to:
Attend meetings to moderate dynamics
Provide alternative reporting structures if needed
Set clear timelines for improvement (start with 90 days)
Get psychologically-focused coaching or counselling
And if this doesn’t work, you may need to make the hard call and let them go if change doesn't occur within a reasonable time. (In a few cases this is what is needed for them to seek the help needed to identify their patterns, and break them).
Your brilliant exceeder can't have unlimited chances while your team and organization suffers. That said....
Transformation is Not Only Possible—It's Predictable
Here's the truth: When faced with the crisis of losing their dream role, brilliant exceeders often become the best transformation clients of all.
Their high-performance orientation, once redirected toward inter and intra personal development, creates rapid change. They apply the same intellectual rigor and commitment to understanding psychology, neuroscience, and emotional intelligence that they previously applied to technical domains.
Sarah now leads with consciousness rather than control.
David rebuilt team trust and stakeholder relationships.
Both transformed career-ending crises into conscious leadership breakthroughs, and they are unrecognisable from their former selves. Sure they occasionally slipped back into old thinking patterns in the early days, and when tired or stressed they even shut down conversations too quickly once more, but they quickly refreshed, and got back on track. Their new deeper self-awareness, reflective capacity, and mindset, led them to keep getting better each day. And in fact their new great leadership skills became their dopamine hit in time. They completely rewired their brains!
Your Strategic Move (What Happens Next)
If you're a brilliant exceeder reading this: This article isn't attacking you, it's offering you a way out of a lifelong pattern that could cost you everything.
Your intelligence is a gift but it doesn't have to be your entire identity.
True leadership influence comes not from being the smartest person in the room, but from asking brilliant questions that make everyone in the room smarter.
If you're a CEO or CPO managing a brilliant exceeder executive: Transformation is predictable, with clear boundaries, specialized psychological support, and courage to confront decades-old patterns.
If gentle coaching has failed. Try something different. And fast!
If you're in HR watching this pattern unfold: Early intervention prevents crisis. Waiting until the final warning wastes years, talent, organizational trust, and company reputation.
The Bottom Line
We celebrate intelligence. Reward technical excellence. Promote based on individual achievement.
Then we are dismayed when brilliant executives do not exhibit the consistent interpersonal leadership capabilities senior executive roles demand.
The transition from employee to manager to leader/executive, from doing the work to enabling others to do the work, to leading the strategy requires a fundamental identity shift.
For those whose entire sense of self rests on being the best, this shift is existential, not tactical.
The smartest person in the room isn't always the most valuable.
Often, it's the person who can unlock the collective intelligence of everyone present who is the most valuable. Your brilliant exceeder can be this person, they just need the right support to unlock these parts of themselves.
** All names, roles, and so on have been changed significantly for confidentiality purposes.
About the Author
Caryn Cridland is a business psychologist, lawyer, and mediator who transforms Fortune 500 executives' career-defining crises into conscious leadership breakthroughs through her proprietary Executive Evolution System.™ With two decades specializing in high-stakes workplace conflicts and leadership development, four degrees in psychology and law, she helps "brilliant exceeders" evolve from intellectual dominance to conscious leadership.
→ Facing this challenge with an executive on your team? Let's talk. Message me directly.
→ Know a brilliant exceeder who needs to read this? Share it. You might save their career.
References
Benson, A., Li, D., & Shue, K. (2019). Promotions and the Peter Principle. The Quarterly Journal of Economics, 134(4), 2085-2134.
Gallup. (2019). State of the American Manager Report.
Gerhardt, K., Bauwens, R., & van Woerkom, M. (2026). Emotional Intelligence and Leader Outcomes: A Comprehensive Review and Roadmap for Future Inquiry. Human Resource Development Review (in press).
Kusy, M., & Holloway, E. (2009). Toxic workplace!: Managing toxic personalities and their systems of power. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
Lee, J., Sim, S., & Tuckey, M. R. (2024). Comparing effects of toxic leadership and team social support on job insecurity, role ambiguity, work engagement, and job performance: A multilevel mediational perspective. Leadership & Organization Development Journal, 45(7), 915-932.
Peter, L. J., & Hull, R. (1969). The Peter principle: Why things always go wrong. New York: William Morrow.
Ruderman, M. N., Hannum, K., Leslie, J. B., & Steed, J. L. (2001). Leadership skills and emotional intelligence. The Leadership Quarterly, 12(4), 285-313.
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